"Do More of What Makes You Happy"

As you get older, you notice that time is getting shorter. You get to the age at which you're entering secondary school, where you feel as if you have all the time in the world to have fun, so you go shopping with your friends, take your dog out for long walks and spend time on family picnics, with a bit of homework here and there. Then there are the end of year exams. This cycle progresses throughout your career at secondary school, with your free time being cut shorter and shorter without you even noticing it. Then BOOM. Year 11 whacks you across the face and you realise that your 'end of year exams' actually have an effect on your future, so for a few months you cut off most of your free time and filling it with endless revision, past papers and note-taking, before eventually spending the last remaining moments of your free time sprawled across the desk of scattered papers dozing off.

Eventually, by the time you hit Sixth Form (the last two years of compulsory education), you have a sudden realisation. All of that time you had spent with your loved ones has been evaporated. You haven't left the house aside from popping to school or the library in weeks and you feel confined to the same few rooms in your own house. That time you spent teaching yourself how to play the piano has all gone to waste, as you can't even remember how to shape a minor chord. You don't remember what daylight looks like. You haven't had a meal out in months.

This realisation happened to me two weeks ago, when we began to write our Personal Statements for university. I used to be able to speak about how I had an "ear for music" and could instantly pick out the correct chords and melody to any song on the keyboard. Now I can only remember one song. I used to love to socialise with my friends on the weekends, which rarely ever happens anymore.  Hey, I even used to win at a round of bowling against my friends and family, now I can scarcely remember which finger goes in which hole in the bowling ball.

Now, free time is almost a foreign word to me. Any "free time" is spent trying to retrace the steps of my old skills, completing my book list for university, writing my Personal Statement (just kidding, that's just not happening), organising my life and also the occasional blog post. Even then, that doesn't happen often, as seen by the number of posts by my fellow writers in comparison to me.

What I wanted to get across was that I wish that I had made myself take some more free time, as I regret letting past hobbies go down the drain. I used to look at a piano and rush over to it, desperate to lay my fingers on the ebony and ivory keys. Now, I have that same enthusiasm, but I stare blankly at the keys in wonder of how I lost the skills to play.

Please make sure that you do more of what makes you most happy, as I wish that I had.

-LF, LR and MG

Expectation vs Reality

We all do it. Spending hours wondering what our lives could be like if you'd said that, done that, looked like that. What we would be like if we were skinnier, prettier, smarter, nicer, happier, richer, or anything other than what we are.

We like to question our choices, bisect ourselves until there is nothing left, and the craziest thing is, that we never get to the root of our actions anyway.

When once asking a teacher if she had any regrets, she told me something that has stuck with me since. She told me:

"I don't believe in regrets. I don't believe in regrets because in that moment you thought you were doing the right thing, and you should never regret doing the right thing." 

I think that a toxic part of our personalities is that we focus too much on what we should have said and done. On what we should be like, and we reprimand ourselves on the fact that we are different to how we imagined we would be.

When really, how often is it that we end up in the place we thought we would. People always say that the best adventures are the ones that are unplanned. So surely, if life is the best adventure, wouldn't it be better to leave it unplanned.

We need to stop having expectations of what we should be like, what we should look like and what we should be doing because it just damages the person we are right now.

Don't get me wrong- reach for the stars. Having goals and working towards them is very important. But don't get so sidetracked working on who you should be, that you forget to enjoy who you are now.

You might not have reached up to your expectations, because often the people we hold ransom to unrealistic expectations, is ourselves. We beat ourselves down for not getting the best grades, for not being the best at something or the prettiest or the skinniest or the most outgoing. When in reality, we need to appreciate ourselves for who we are.

I don't mean 'no regrets' like in the 'yolo' sense. I mean no regrets, because you are living your life on one path, when by now you have probably made a few choices that means that you could have been living your life on a totally different one.

I mean, don't regret who you are. Don't regret how far you've come. Even though for most of you, the person you are now, is nothing like the person you thought you might become, that doesn't mean you should regret that.

As I said, the best adventures in life are unplanned, and if life is the best adventure, then you're doing it great.

Just something to think about over this stressful period!

-LF, LR, and MG

How Not To Be Squashed By Exam Stress

Everyone knows what we mean when we say the summer term. Long gone are the happy memories of extended break time in the sun, t-shirts and shorts or summer dresses. The mixture of suncream and ice cream wafting in through the open classroom windows.

All that disappeared as most of us hit year ten, with it intensifying for year 11-13. Now when someone mentions the summer term, you see a bunch of 15-18 year olds cringing, significantly tensing up, tears welling in their stressed out eyes.

We all know that with May and June approaching, summer term turns into exam season. Counting down the days until our first exam and then to the last, before we are free! However, on some level or another, exams are known to cause a lot of distress and in the worst cases can trigger intense anxiety, depression and cause us to malfunction because we are unable to survive copious amounts of pressure that piles up as exams loom closer.

So how to survive?! Revision is a must, and the long days can sometimes be too much for people to take. Here are some tips that should get you through the summer months:

1) Each day set yourself reasonable targets of what you want to achieve. Try to set a small list of things that you know you will be able to accomplish if you stick to schedule. Some people find a timetable the most effective way to do this, but personally, a list works just find, ticking the things you have done as you go. This way at the end of each day, you will feel that you have achieved what you needed to do, and end off by feeling good about yourself and your progress instead of overwhelmed and like you are unable to meet your targets. This way you will maintain a hard working and positive attitude that will see you through the exam period.

2) Sleep. (I don't mean between 3am to 12pm.) I mean sleep long, workable hours. Aim for about eight hours a night, with an early start so that you can be productive from the beginning of the day and finish revision as early as possible. The less time spent working in the evening the better, in order to get a good break and prepare yourself for the next day. Sleep is a time for your body and your brain to get optimum rest, so don't miss out on it, because it will affect your revision outcomes.

3) Maintaining a healthy diet and drinking water. This is something that is often preached about, but seriously can actually have a big effect. It is proven that a healthy body can equal a healthy mind, and therefore, eating three good meals a day, with a snack in between can alter your progress and help you in feeling better and more productive during the day.

4) Take breaks! It is unhealthy to be stuck inside all day! I suggest working in a room with windows, natural daylight is important, and opening your window will make the room brighter and help you to focus with fresh air. After you tick off one thing on your list, take a 15-20 minute break, helping you re-cooperate and will also keep you focused when you are working. Once a day, take a longer break, say 45 minutes and go for a walk, get fresh air and some exercise, both things that have significantly improved my progress in revision.

Those are just some techniques that help me to calm down and stay focused. Exam stress for the most part is inevitable, but as long as you practise calming techniques, as listed above, you will hopefully give yourself enough breathing space to remember that you are going to do it.

I would say that the best way not to be squashed by exam stress is to remember one very important thing:

Yes, exams are important and no one is denying that. However, exams are not the only important thing. They do not define who you are as a person and what you are going to be like for the rest of your life. They do help shape your future, but there are so many other factors that shape your future, not just exams. Sometimes you just need to go for a walk or have a chat with a friend to remind yourself that life will go on, and the most important thing is that you retain your mental and physical health, not that you pass your exams but have become a wreck as well.

At the end of the day, we should not be letting a bunch of letters on a sheet of paper define who we are or what we are worth as people, and when you find yourself being swallowed up by the idea that your exams are the be all and end all, take a step out, read this post, and remind yourself that you are worth so much more that some grades on a piece of paper, and you should never forget that.

-LF, LR and MG