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Monday, 11 May 2015

Expectation vs Reality

We all do it. Spending hours wondering what our lives could be like if you'd said that, done that, looked like that. What we would be like if we were skinnier, prettier, smarter, nicer, happier, richer, or anything other than what we are.

We like to question our choices, bisect ourselves until there is nothing left, and the craziest thing is, that we never get to the root of our actions anyway.

When once asking a teacher if she had any regrets, she told me something that has stuck with me since. She told me:
"I don't believe in regrets. I don't believe in regrets because in that moment you thought you were doing the right thing, and you should never regret doing the right thing." 
I think that a toxic part of our personalities is that we focus too much on what we should have said and done. On what we should be like, and we reprimand ourselves on the fact that we are different to how we imagined we would be.

When really, how often is it that we end up in the place we thought we would. People always say that the best adventures are the ones that are unplanned. So surely, if life is the best adventure, wouldn't it be better to leave it unplanned.

We need to stop having expectations of what we should be like, what we should look like and what we should be doing because it just damages the person we are right now.

Don't get me wrong- reach for the stars. Having goals and working towards them is very important. But don't get so sidetracked working on who you should be, that you forget to enjoy who you are now.

You might not have reached up to your expectations, because often the people we hold ransom to unrealistic expectations, is ourselves. We beat ourselves down for not getting the best grades, for not being the best at something or the prettiest or the skinniest or the most outgoing. When in reality, we need to appreciate ourselves for who we are.

I don't mean 'no regrets' like in the 'yolo' sense. I mean no regrets, because you are living your life on one path, when by now you have probably made a few choices that means that you could have been living your life on a totally different one.

I mean, don't regret who you are. Don't regret how far you've come. Even though for most of you, the person you are now, is nothing like the person you thought you might become, that doesn't mean you should regret that.

As I said, the best adventures in life are unplanned, and if life is the best adventure, then you're doing it great.

Just something to think about over this stressful period!

-LF, LR, and MG